"We're going FULL Agile!" you announce with manufactured enthusiasm. You implement everything you learned in that expensive certification course.
Daily standups. Sprint planning. Backlog refinement. Sprint reviews. Retrospectives. Plus "stakeholder sync sessions" to keep everyone aligned.
Week 1: The team complains they're spending 20 hours per week in meetings and only 20 hours actually coding. "That's the Agile way!" your Scrum Master chirps.
Week 2: End-users start attending daily standups. They use them as opportunities to add new requirements. Mid-sprint. During what's supposed to be a 15-minute status update.
Week 3: Senior management discovers sprint reviews and starts attending. The VP of Sales uses them to pitch their own feature ideas. The CFO brings printouts of competitor websites and says "we need this."
Your sprint reviews now run 3 hours. Your retrospectives are therapy sessions. Your backlog refinement meetings have 47 attendees and accomplish nothing.
The team is drowning. Your Scrum Master keeps saying "this is very collaborative!" while developers quietly update their LinkedIn profiles during ceremonies.
Your lead developer's status message now reads: "ACTIVELY seeking new opportunities."
What do you do?